No One Is Auto Immune
Picking a car can bring on an identity crisis, and in L.A., that's a good thing
Carol
Wolper
Lou Beach
The good news: The sluggish economy means great deals on new cars. The bad news: The money you save might have to go toward therapy for the identity crisis you develop as you try to decide which car is right for you.
My crisis came prematurely when I accompanied my friend Jake to a BMW dealership. Awaiting him was a done deal on the exact car Jake wanted, which is to say the updated version of the exact same model he’d been driving forever. The only thing left to decide was color—black or gray. However, Jake went into mental gridlock while viewing the cars side by side. When the salesman ran the numbers—and they were very good numbers—and Jake did not react, I suspected something was wrong. When he said the car could be ready in an hour and Jake said we couldn’t wait but he’d come back, I knew something was wrong—so did the salesman. Even as they shook hands and Jake said all the right things, I sensed this sale wasn’t going to happen.
I’ve known Jake a long time. He has never been one to stall on follow-through or indulge in second-guessing. It was clear that what I’d witnessed was a guy who, at the critical I-do moment, said, “I don’t.” Before I could ask what provoked his change of heart, he derailed me by asking, “When’s your lease up? What are you going to get?” A simple enough question, but the more I dwelled on my own road identity, the more confused I became. That’s when I realized buying a new car in L.A. is analyzing who you were, who you are and who you want to be. Or put another way: Are you what you drive?
As if the choices weren’t complicated enough (color, size, extras), now there’s growing peer pressure to drive something eco-friendly. Who would blame you if you find yourself suddenly booking a shrink session—or two?
So it seems I’m right in the same conflicted place as Jake, except with a few more months on my lease. Am I boring? Adventurous? Easily manipulated? Vain? Trying too hard to appear young—or cool? Not trying enough? Do I need to prove I’m politically correct? Do I resent the pressure to give up my SUV? Do I dare choose a color other than black?
I have gone through this before. I remember when I realized I was too old to drive a white, soft-top Jeep Wrangler. I was at a light, and next to me was a girl in the identical car. It was a sunny day, and we both had the top off and the radio on. We were also both wearing a T-shirt and jeans and had our hair in a ponytail. The difference was she was probably no more than 20, and I was 35. It was obvious right then that the surfer look had an expiration date, and the line between sporty and silly was a thin one.
That’s when I switched to a black Toyota 4Runner, the four-wheel-drive model I never came close to putting into four-wheel drive. With tinted windows, it looked like every other SUV on the road. And that was the point—to go from “Look at me” to “Don’t look at me.”
But now that it’s time for a change, the question is, to what? I believe in minimizing my carbon footprint, but the thought of a Prius—the car of choice of so many of my friends—brings out my rebellious streak...and my claustrophobia. An SUV hybrid seems the logical choice, except it’s more than I want to spend. I’ve looked at smaller SUVs, which seemed like a good idea until I noticed that my more affluent friends buy those exact models for their nannies. Of course it shouldn’t matter, but good judgment isn’t always in the driver’s seat. Is that shrink session starting to make sense now?
Most therapists will agree that car-shopping confusion is neurotic, possibly, but not out of line with reality. We live in a megalopolis that keeps us in transit for a good part of every day. To the world around us, a car is the most visible sign of our identity.
Years ago I lived across from a guy who rented a one-bedroom apartment, but he drove a very loud red Ferrari. You don’t need a master’s degree to figure out that guy’s psychology: “Please judge this book by its cover.” Sure, cars can get resold or, in the case of that Ferrari, repossessed, but at the moment of purchase, you’re making a choice about who you are today and who you think you’ll be over the next few years.
I envy people who know exactly what car they want and have no self-doubts. However, I don’t envy people who live in places like New York or other cities with such extensive mass transit they don’t need an automobile. How will they ever realize who they really are? They don’t know what they’re missing. Going through the stress of buying a car is actually an opportunity to ask yourself some serious questions—and a good reason (as in, the amount of money at stake) to answer them correctly.
By the way, Jake decided on the Lexus GS hybrid in black opal, and I have no idea why. That’s between him and his shrink. Meanwhile, I’m still reading car magazines in the hopes of finding the perfect ride for whoever it is I am.
Categories: My L.A.
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You need to get a white Chevy Malibu. A not good at anything, boring, vehicle that isn't the least bit memorable.
Posted by: Your Wife | 03/24/2010 at 09:59 AM
what a stupid article. Many people DONT care or read into what they drive,/
you are just another idiot in a car....
Posted by: ted | 03/24/2010 at 10:16 AM
Lexus GS hybrid?
Poser.
Posted by: Observer | 03/24/2010 at 12:55 PM
Get what makes you happy. For me, it's almost anything with a manual transmission. I'm planning on giving up a big BMW for a VW GTI.
Posted by: independent skeptic | 03/24/2010 at 04:33 PM
Typical Angeleno - thinking other people really CARE about what YOU drive.
Posted by: Firecracker | 03/24/2010 at 04:55 PM
Just one car? I have an old pickup, a four sedan, and a roadster. I also have 2 motorcycles and scooter. Practicality, need, fun, speed, versitility, are what I'm going for and no one vehicle can do that. Nothing I have cost over $21K. And 4 of them were under $10K. I suppose I could have bundled everything up and bought a high end sedan, but they're boring. BTW: you sound like you need a Subaru.
Posted by: John Smith | 03/25/2010 at 09:59 AM
How sad that you need a car to tell you who you are. ("However, I don’t envy people who live in places like New York or other cities with such extensive mass transit they don’t need an automobile. How will they ever realize who they really are?")
Posted by: Material Girl | 03/25/2010 at 09:45 PM
I think the author's only mistake is assuming that other people invest this much of themselves in their cars. Some care far more about their shoes, or their pets, or where they hang out, or the varieties of roses they grow in their yard, or how many followers they have on Twitter. Unless you know how much someone cares about a thing, there's a limit to how much intention you can read into their choices.
Posted by: TNH | 03/28/2010 at 06:04 AM
What I find most interesting about the article is that you all feel the need to comment on it.
And I know I am commenting as well.
Posted by: David | 05/27/2010 at 06:13 PM
Wow this town is uptight!
Posted by: John Brown | 05/28/2010 at 10:27 AM
The marketing expert Clotaire Rapaille found that Americans subconsciously associate their cars with their own identity; this is why the PT Cruiser is so popular here but not in Germany, where cars are primarily expected to be well-engineered. I love the idea that without having to choose a car, we wouldn't know who we are! We are so busy, that may be true!
Posted by: Tammy Metzger | 05/28/2010 at 01:55 PM
"However, I don’t envy people who live in places like New York or other cities with such extensive mass transit they don’t need an automobile."
I do. Sitting in a car in traffic sucks almost as much as trying to find a park.
Posted by: Bike LA | 05/28/2010 at 06:37 PM
"When’s your lease up?"
Wait a sec, you lease? BWAHAHAHAHAHA...
Posted by: Joe | 05/31/2010 at 10:22 AM
A new Lexus will have a $875 destination fee, a $500 dealer fee. The battery on the hybrid will cost $5000 to replace at the end of it's life. Researching all this I have come to the conclusion that anybody who buys a new hybrid is an idiot. Since 80% of Lexus vehicles will be returned after there 3 year lease, it makes better sense to buy a slightly used hybrid.
Posted by: B | 05/31/2010 at 01:05 PM
The Chevy Impala was the most comfortable rental car amongst it, and the Malibu and an Accord. You only have to decide you don't need any panache.
They really inexpensive for what you get, and you can get a nice watch to show off when you're not driving. Now there's a quest that could also take you to your therapist.
Posted by: AZcpa | 05/31/2010 at 04:12 PM
This article is such a farce. And to consider a hybrid? The author is complicit with the larger media's disinformation campaign of the fantastically filthy, high carbon outputting, eco-destroying, toxic byproduct spewing reality of battery manufacturing. GET A DIESEL is you're actually worried.
Posted by: Marc | 06/01/2010 at 08:11 AM
Its easy - 2011 Black 5.0 Mustang GT with manual transmission, Brembo brake package, and 3.73:1 axle ratio.
Posted by: Chuck | 06/06/2010 at 09:00 AM
The only real identity issue that is an absolute with cars is the following........
The faster the car, the less effect the Viagra is having on the driver................
(For examplw Porsche = Viagra doesn't work at all anymore)
Posted by: Real World | 06/21/2010 at 10:02 AM
Seriously sad. Get a sensible used car, or keep your same car and save the money for your retirement. If you have the luxury of just throwing money away, why not give it to a charity.
Posted by: mw | 06/21/2010 at 11:38 AM
The last time I was back in Tinseltown, I went to this party. There I was chatting up this busty blonde. After about 10 minutes she asked me what kind of car I drove. I'm not that quick. Usually, my best comeback lines come to me about 45 minutes later when I'm tooling down the 10. However, this time without a beat I just pointed to her chest and asked-Are those real?. She teetered on her 4 inch heels and walked away. God I love this town!
Posted by: troyce key | 06/21/2010 at 04:47 PM
Ride a bike.
Posted by: Steve | 06/25/2010 at 02:24 PM
That is why an antique car is so much fun to drive. Your identity is suppressed by the car's history.
Posted by: Leslie | 12/03/2010 at 10:33 AM
John Smith and I have a lot in common. Except I only have one sedan. :) One car......I don't think so.
Posted by: Eddie Haskell | 12/03/2010 at 02:05 PM
"I envy people who know exactly what car they want and have no self-doubts."
Okay, I've wanted an Audi Allroad 4WD wagon since 2005 - but too expensive then (+45K). I waited until last year to get a used one. What does that say about me? Wait don't answer that!
Posted by: Canjac Canjar | 12/03/2010 at 05:01 PM
I live in Canada and we choose cars pretty much for their ability to look and run in decent order during rain, snow, ice and god knows what else...black does best it seems (white looks like c--p in no time flat) and there isnt a lot of ego attached to it as all our cars look equally dingy 7 mos. out of the year ...that sort of takes the pain out of the choice...
Posted by: ac | 12/03/2010 at 11:27 PM
I have two vehicles. Perception of character also lands squarely on the shoulders of the pedestrian. I drive a 45 year old Ford F100 that I bought on eBay for $1500. My other car is a 2009 BMW M5. I always get a laugh when I drive the old pick up truck women especially, look away and shield their small children from my potential poor old pedophile looking persona. In the BMW those same women smile, flip their hair and stare. Shallow much!
Posted by: Enzo Cinquecento | 12/22/2010 at 07:09 AM
Maybe you & your friend should consider vehicles you can actually afford to buy....
Posted by: Jill | 12/22/2010 at 10:28 AM
What a shallow article.
I rather enjoyed it.
Posted by: AB | 03/28/2011 at 01:15 PM
This is a stupid article. I am thankful that I have a car and that works well. I am very confident and satisfied with myself. I think trying to buy a ridiculous expensive car tries to compensate for the lack of confidence in an individual. Lease? hahahha Don't even make me go there!
Posted by: Fernando | 04/14/2011 at 08:45 PM
Get your dream car online at incredibly low cost, yes it is possible by participating in Japanese auctions. Most of the used cars buyers are not aware of auctions and they are paying more than what it actually worth so always do some research before wasting money.
Posted by: Nissan Skyline For Sale | 05/08/2012 at 11:58 PM